Falling Off Stage: Part 1

So, I have the unfortunate habit of falling off of or onto every stage I have ever performed on. This is not, as you might think, because I lack grace or co-ordination. No, good people. It is because I have been CURSED! It is a nefarious curse, a diabolical, horrifying, EVIL curse! A curse of such epic proportions that, well, it makes me fall. On stage. A lot. Ahem.

Anyway.

The first tragic incident occurred when I was merely nine years old. I was an innocent child then, blissfully unaware of the tragic turn my life was about to take...

It all began with a PVC Pipe set. Now, if you’ve never seen a set made out of PVC Pipe you might not understand the following events, so let me quickly describe it for you. First off,PVC pipe is long thin pipe that can be joined at angles and is typically used for plumbing.



We used our Pipe to build a house with three walls and no roof. We then covered the “walls” with painted bed sheets and voila! House! It was obviously a very big budget, bells and whistles musical. The play we were doing was Pippi Longstocking and one of the gags was that Pippi always climbed onto the roof of her house. Obviously our house had no roof, but we improvised by having me climb a ladder and stick my head up over the top of the pipe house. You can probably tell where this is going, can’t you?

Well, one fateful night (I’ve always wanted to start a story with “one fateful night.” Doesn’t it just sound ominous and amazing? Like something dark and or sticky is about to burst out of the woods behind you, or some really famous baby is being born. Like J Lo) we had been performing the show as usual, when it was time for me to climb the ladder. (the ladder OF DOOM! MUAHAHAHAAAAAAAaaaaaa)



Now, I had climbed this ladder many times before, but this time...... My shoe was untied. So, as I made to descend the ladder:



Well, okay, maybe not that bad, but I did trip and fall off the ladder, taking the PVC house down with me in a tremendous crashing pile.

We closed the curtains, fixed the set, and tried to go on with the play. Unfortunately, the next line was “Pippi, I’ll never get used to you jumping all over your house like that...”

We had to close the curtain three more times before Anakin could say it with a straight face.


NEXT TIME ON “FALLING OFF STAGE”:
Sasha falls into an Orchestra Pit dressed like a princess.